November 29, 2014, by Laurie Jacobs

Sports DAY

Saturday is here. After a long, or really any type of week at University, the weekend has arrived. How better to celebrate a Saturday than by taking up a statuesque residence on the sofa and taking in all of the days sporting action.

I say statuesque, but this of course excludes the obligatory jumping up and down, exclamative arm waving, and the issuing of vitriolic instruction or corrections to the decisions of the match day officials.

However, by virtue of this Saturday being a proverbial melting pot of sporting activity, to truly enjoy the full range of sporting activity involves a quite serious degree of administration and timetabling prowess.

The full timetable of the 29/10/2014 sports day is as follows.

12.00 – Snooker: The UK Championships. I know what you’re thinking. But at midday there is really nothing else to watch. Disregard what I said earlier about exclamative arm waving – the only real activity involved in this time period is the muttering of the words “good shot” when you feel it’s relevant.

12.45 – Football: Lunchtime Kick off. It’s not West Ham, but it’s not snooker either.

14.30 – Rugby Union comes charging in to the fold, the viewer must now balance two games at once, Wales vs New Zealand and England vs Australia.

15.00 – Football – Afternoon Kick offs. The crucial point of the day, and this really sorts the men from the boys, the women from the girls, etcetera. One laptop with beloved West Ham, one continuing with England rugby, TV broadcasting from the millennium stadium. Who said men couldn’t multi-task.


For the best viewing experience, the girlfriends/housemates laptops may need to be drafted in. 


17.00 – Brief respite, time to refuel, recharge and get focused for the evening kick off.

17.30 – Football: Evening Kick off. I have, by far, seen enough football for the day. People are running around and I’m unsure what the object of the game is any more. Tries? Goals? Touchdowns? 147 maximum breaks? Help.

19.30 – The culmination of the day, the evening’s boxing from the ExCel Arena, London. Rules are far more straightforward. Punch opponent in head. Bliss.

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