March 22, 2017, by Lucy
What Happens When You Become an English Student
You will be able to talk your way out of any given scenario.
All that essay writing allows you to become skilled when it comes to arguing a point, even when you aren’t 100% behind it. In those scenarios where you are in the midst of a debating about whose turn it is to buy the toilet roll (you know, the serious things) only to realise that, actually, it is your turn, you will bless the lucky stars that you are an English undergraduate. No more caving in, it is time to preserve your dignity. Go on, use them interdisciplinary skills you have. Reach for your mental dictionary, delve into their psychology, they’ll be wrapped around your finger in no time.
No TV show will ever be too complicated for you.
Before university, you were just another drop in the ocean, a mere mortal who became perplexed five minutes into an episode of Sherlock. Pathetic. However, having become accustomed to keeping up with the plots of three different texts a week, no detective thriller is too much for you.
Of course the murderer was the baker’s best mate’s wife, it was sooo obvious. English student? More like detective, mate.
You will feel like you have completed Mount Everest every time you accomplish the four flights of stairs in Hallward.
Yeah, that’s right, I said it. Those stairs are an ACCOMPLISHMENT. Despite going to the library with the intention of planning six essays and completing your debut novel, most of the time you spend half of your visit recovering from the inadvertent exercise regime you have just undertaken.
You will enter a troublesome relationship with the idea of referencing.
Come deadline period, the two of you spend all your time together. No matter what you do, where you go, or who you’re with, the thought of APA or MHRA is always looming over you. With referencing comes stress, without referencing comes failure. You learn to accept that referencing will be a constant part of your academic life because, lets’ be honest, it will all pay off in the end… Hopefully.
You will never not be smug about being based in Trent.
Yeah, you may only spend 50% of your time in the Trent Building, but it is still the School of English and therefore that entitles you to an immense deal of bragging rights. You know it’s pretty. You know it’s an architectural masterpiece. You know it’s the best building on campus, and yet you will never be able to hide your smug face when anyone mentions it.