January 15, 2015, by Tilly Potter
Revision meltdown countdown
T-minus one week. Notes in order in their respective folders? Check. Obligatory highlighters and note paper bought? Check. Status: reasonably smug.
T-minus three days. This massive wadge of material can be revised in three days, right? It’s been done before. Temporarily ignoring the fact it’s final year now and things are different and a lot harder. It’ll be fine. Is it time for a cup of tea yet? Status: denial, with a tinge of arrogance.
T-minus two days. The need to get out of the house is becoming unbearable. Becoming bored of the same old view out of the same old window at the same old desk. Eventually escape to a coffee shop or walk in meaningless circles around the block, wringing hands wretchedly. Locals give strange glances at the girl with the vacant expression who clearly hasn’t brushed her hair. Status: boredom with a hint of terror.
T-minus one day. Oops, that was an unintentional lie-in. Let’s brew some strong coffee. Become super caffeine charged and bash out ‘most important’ facts and names on the computer, which are later translated to multicoloured, super-highlighted, ringed and underlined tiny revision cards. The brighter it looks the more it’ll go in, right? Status: revision frenzy.
T-minus 12 hours. The panic and tears come. It’s midnight the night before, and it feels like all is lost. ‘It’s so unfair! I made so many notes during the term. But for what purpose?’ cue worry of failing degree, never getting a job, followed by existential crisis. Status: the end is nigh.
T-minus six hours. Cramming brightly coloured notecards begins. Pacing up and down room, trying to distinguish ‘Watanabe et al, 2001’ from ‘Addams et al, 1986’. Status: tunnel vision revision.
T-minus two hours. Trying to convince oneself that something more than a slice of toast should be consumed, but worried it won’t be kept down. Status: green around the gills.
T-minus 15 minutes. Last glance over notes while being shuffled into hall. Status: what do I have to lose?
Exam over. Status: cramped hand, but much more relieved brain.
*Some of the above may be mildly exaggerated. Other stages scarily accurate. I’ll leave that up to you to decide.
**If you’re genuinely feeling stressed, advice from the University can be found here: http://nottingham.ac.uk/counselling/exam-anxiety/index.aspx. Best of luck with the rest of exams!
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