April 19, 2012, by Gael

Seeing the Light – Somewhat Bittersweet?

I’m reaching that beautiful stage that you get to in an assignment where you’ve got a draft done, the edits are coming together, and while you’ve get a while to go yet, it’s beginning to take form, the jigsaw pieces are fitting together and the picture’s completion is in sight…yes, my dissertation is in its final stages, and is it quite geekily sad of me to say that in seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, I’m beginning to worry that I’ll feel a little lost when it’s finally done and dusted.

As regular’s to my blogs will do, my final dissertation has somewhat taken over my day to day routine, especially in the last 6 weeks. Now I’m reaching it’s completion, and I can see my life after dissertation, I’m beginning to worry quite what I’ll do with myself – I’ve become used to the safe and almost soothing routine of waking up – getting some exercise in, and knuckling down to spend hours reading, writing, procrastinating and motivating myself to write, edit and think dissertation, dissertation, dissertation…what do I do with the hours once I’ve got them back?

I’m sure when that time comes, it won’t actually be a problem, but today, as I sit back home, with a solid draft complete, papers strewn around me with edits and re-shuffles it hits me that soon enough this routine, this picture that probably epitomises final year student life, will be over…and it hits me that maybe it isn’t the dissertation I’ll miss…but the realisation that these student days are coming closer and closer to an end.

Yes I’m excited to join the real world, and to have some money and some projects which make an impact, to not constantly be running out of toilet roll, or come into a living room and be greeted by COD everyday, to have evenings off and be aware of current affairs (although maybe my ignorance to current affairs has nothing to do with me being a student, but just me…being me)…but in all honesty now I’m thinking about it – there is so so much I will miss about being a student at UoN, and I’m sort of wishing I could drag these assignments and exams out longer, just to keep this student lifestyle for that teeny big longer.

Being a student at Nottingham University, means being constantly close to someone who’s willing to have a fun few hours, whether that means getting stuck into the student volunteer centre, or helping a friend out with their society, or pottering off to Wollaton Park for an ice cream, or Victoria Centre to hit the shops…there’s always someone, and something to while away free time, and procrastinating hours with. Soon I’ll be in one of those jobs where 9-5 I’ll be sitting in the office, stressing, spilling coffee, jealously looking at the sunshine outside, and wishing for those student days where yes the budget was tighter, and the work was tough, but time was my own, and entertainment was a plenty…ahhh what I wouldn’t give to be one of those fresh faced A-Level students I’ve recently been showing round the University, to re-live these three years again, and get stuck into even more experiences and quirky secrets UoN is constantly putting on offer…But I’ll have to move aside, let other’s taste the delights…and go out and earn the tax to put them through the wonderful time that I had – I wouldn’t begrudge them it for the world – well maybe a little!

It’s funny how when the end is in reach, and you see the light you’ve been aiming for – it begins to take on that cold light of day and you realise just how hazy and dreamy those student days were…ahh well, at-least I have 3months left of them – and time to make it count.

G xx

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